The fact is you can debate this for ages, it depends on any characters background and character what they are going to call you, i have had guardsmen call me Ma'am, peasant, civilian ive been called lady, wench, no matter who you are everyone is going to have a different response, some people are pretty ignorant others are understanding and play along.
Not to be judgemental but in the end the better the rper will recognise your character for who they are and will respond to you the way their character wants to.