Three Times Three Equals ?

[Mr Bloodaxe]

Three Patrols: To Altmere, then to the Graveyard, then to the Orc Fort

Led By:
Hoagie, Sergeant

Attended by:
Takeamada, Junior Guardsman
Ludwik Bloodaxe, Watchman

Report:
It was early in the afternoon and three of us were eager and ready to get moving, Hoagie decided that we were going to complete three patrols to ensure the safety of Cove.

We started by heading off to Altmere, there were a couple of trolls hanging around, so we quickly took them down and checked the inside of Altmere. Everything seemed fine and as we had two more patrols to complete, we took a quick stop at the new building next to Altmere for refreshment, I had some water and a lovely pie before being showed round the building by Takeamada. Apparently this was the Grenadier Hall, it was a fine building.

We then headed to the Graveyard, I've been there so many times that I could probably take down those undead in my sleep, especially now I have completed a map of the area too. We entered and struck down all the things that came up from the ground, they will probably wish they never bothered as they got sent from where they came with a couple of swift hits. Even the Lich was left arse over tit in no time at all, stupid thing, thinking it can mess with Cove.

The Orc Fort was the last destination on the list, on route it seemed that Sergeant Hoagie had picked up a chicken who was happily following him around. Cue jokes, which we happily obliged with statements such as "Can I eat your cock". Anyway, we got to the Orc Fort and unfortunately the first casualty was infact Hoagie's cock, it tried hard to take down an Orc brute but was just not big enough or hard enough to do so. Luckily, the rest of us were so we slowly took the big fella down which demoralised the rest of the orcs as we swiftly made our way though the fort to the docks. Takeamada swiftly showed us his dancing skills which were awful slightly better than Sergeant Hoagie's.

We were then told to do a forced march back to the barracks which we did with impressive gusto, naturally I was quickest and we lined up, brushing off the marks we had picked up from the fighting.

After another remark about Hoagie's cock, he announced that 10,000 gold pieces were to go to the coffers towards my promotion and 2,000 gold pieces would go towards Takeamada's. It was a very successful set of patrols and in this case, three guardsmen on three patrols equals around about 12,000 Gold pieces and one "whacked off" cock!

*Signed*
Ludwik Bloodaxe, Watchman

[Raiden Morana]

Good work chaps, though a little too much time spent discussin' the chicken.

I think the less said about Sergeant Hoagie's co.... *coughs* chicken, the better!

*signed*

Raiden, Grenadier Captain.