The Covetowne Gazette: The World's Greatest NewspaperBy picking up this paper you have agreed to pay 25 crowns to Linaeus Blackwind the next time you see him. Artistic license assumed with all sketches; believe at your own risk. The Gazette is not responsible for emotional, physical, or financial harm inflicted by the reading, posession, or, in rare cases, burning of this pamphlet.Recruit Walter Darkmoore Seen Kissing ManRumors of manloving in the Company were confirmed today when a note from an anonymous but undoubtedly trustworthy source revealed that Mercenary Recruit Walter Darkmoore was seen kissing an unknown man. When questioned on the issue, Recruit Darkmoore assaulted Gazette correspondant Lucius I. Edwards. Mr. Edwards escaped without serious injury, but was visibly shaken.
Covian Manloving Company?
Company Terrorizes Covetowne
Residents of Covetowne awoke last evening to the sound of their doors being kicked in as the Company, in a training exercise, went from house to house searching for another group of Mercenaries. When the second group was found, the two groups briefly exchanged blows, declared a victor, then started over again.
"Oh Crap." remarked one citizen as the Mercenaries began preparing for round two.
Especially hard hit was the Armorer's, which was previously set fire to and raided during the Great Radish Scare. The Company blamed the Hats.
Torrak Keres Embarks On Reign Of TerrorMercenary Torrak Keres, sources have stated, has recently embarked on a campaign of death, destruction, terror, and smashed windows. He started by leading a several hour long, grueling, soul-crushing training, which several attendees did not survive. Afterwards, sources state, he led his men on a hike that left many attendees' feet bleeding.
A Gazette official, sources say, watched in horror as Mr. Keres strolled casually by his home, stopped, scooped up a rock, and hurled it through a second floor window of Editor Blackwind's home.
Torrak Keres - scourge of Cove.
- Linaeus C. Blackwind, Editor in Chief, Reporter General, Primary Publisher,
Writer, and Distributor.
The Covetowne Gazette- Aided by Lucius I. Edwards, Reporter and Crier.(OOC Note: The names in the journals in screenshots are not IC knowledge under any circumstances. This newspaper is liberally tossed about on the ground and front steps throughout town the morning after it is printed, and the stories in it are IC information. The names mentioned -in the text- may be treated as IC information.)
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