*Yawning the bald bartender of the local tavern glanced over the empty contents of his dark tavern which was only lighted by a few small candles and the bright moonlight coming through the window*
Bahhh… I could be at home right now with me ugly wench of a wife but here I‘m stuck with that bloody kid… *Frowning deeply the bartender walked over towards Ryan and placed his chubby hand on the bar in front of him*
Alright then lad… I know me tavern rules say I stay open as long as I be having customers… but yer pushing it now! Ye‘ve been sitting here staring at that ale of yers since eight o‘clock this evening! And its midnight now!
So ye either tell me what the hell is bothering ye laddy… or I‘ll grab ye by yer neck and yer belt and toss it right out of me tavern!*Ryan kept his eyes fixed on his half empty ale bottle and released a deep sigh after the bartenders outburst towards him*
B…but if I be tellin‘ ye what ‘appened ye would kick meh out anyway.. So what the ‘ell would be the difference?*Rubbing his bald head the bartender started to smirk as he glanced towards the door*
Well… yer see lad.. I have these here very nasty pointy rocks right outside of me tavern! So the difference would be… if ye nay tell me a thing and remain being a pain in the arse I‘ll toss ye towards them rocks there.. And if ye do tell me I toss it on the grass.. So what will it be?!*Wincing faintly at the idea of the sharp razor like rocks outside Ryan quickly nodded and took another drink from the ale bottle in front of him*
Alroit alroit… ye know ye could ‘ave just asked meh nicely.. Its nay like ye be ‘avin‘ to threaten meh to ’ear some tales comin’ out of meh or somethin’.*Rubbing his stomach the bald bartender laughed and nodded a few times*
Alright alright laddy! Lets hear that there story then.. Since that goes above going to that hog of mine any day.. Bywhaha!*Smirking faintly Ryan digged around in his pocket and pulled out a few dirty pieces of paper along with a pencil*
Well… alroit then… this ‘ere all ‘appened a while ago it did.. Ye see the barracks was startin‘ to run out of supplies since the lass responsible fer gettin‘ em ’ad nay been gettin’ any escorts fer ’er caravans.
Well… ye know meh bein’ the gentleman I am.. Well.. Err.. I offered to ’elp ’er I did.. Even rented a ship fer ’er since this ’ere load was so bloodi big!
And the best thin’ was.. This ’ere ship only cost meh twenty gold coins to ’ire fer a week and it was ’UGE too!
There might ’ave been a leak or two in that there thin’… but nothin’ a wee bit of repairin’ wouldn’t fix I tell ye.*The bartender leaned on the wooden bar and shook his head while listening to Ryan’s story*
I even got a good crew together I did! Plenty of guardsmen to protect the cargo.. A fisherman to catch us a snack or somethin‘ on the way.. And the lass who wanted em goods.. At least that there way she could see meh good work!*Chuckling loudly the bartender slapped his knee and looked at Ryan*
And that there way ye could get lucky with her eh?! Bywhaha! I know how yer mind works laddy!*Blushing faintly Ryan started down at the empty sheet of paper in front of him and quickly started to draw on it*
W…well.. Err.. That might ‘ave been part of the plan… but nay the main part I tell ye! Em militia folk be needin‘ their ale!
Anyway… after we set off with that there ship we sailed around fer a few hours with nay thin‘ but water around us fer miles… but after a while this ‘ere island appeared out of nowhere I tell ye!
And… err… it be the crews fault that we crashed into it! Nay the captains fault! I did fine I tell ye… I err… uhh.. Lets just move on alroit!?*Sniggering the bartender nodded and looked at Ryan with interest again*
W…well.. Uhh.. Seein‘ as the whole front of meh ship broke off I ordered meh men to get their arses off the ship and jump on the land..
Only one person died in that there crash I tell ye.. That there stubborn tiller man insisted on goin‘ down with the ship… ‘e was mad I tell ye!
But thank the avatar em other folk were all understandin‘ and never blamed meh fer crashin‘ the ship! *Grinning nervously Ryan shoved the sheet of paper in front of the bartenders eyes and quickly started to draw on the next sheet*
Well… afterwards I ordered two of em recruits to scout em lands which we crashed ourselves on.. And wouldn‘t ye know it.. When em reported back em told meh it was a deserted island! There was nay a single soul there.. Nay even any bloodi animals!
So the first thin‘ we did was gather up the food we ‘ad left and build ourselves a camp there.. Bein‘ that there was nay way out of there and everythin‘… it looked like we were in fer a lon‘ lon‘ stay.
We worked on that there camp fer hours I tell ye.. There was this ’ere ’uge forests on the island so we ’ad plenty of food to make up a wee defence fer ourselves and nay to mention get a fire goin’ since most of the food we brought alon’ on our journey was raw and everythin’.
Well.. We finally got that there camp ready before sunset.. And a good thin‘ too since even if there were nay animals out there… there was somethin‘ about that there forests that gave meh the creeps.. Like we were bein‘ watched or somethin‘.
Oh! And bein‘ the good leader that I am..! I told all of em folk to brin‘ a sleepin‘ bag alon‘ and everythin‘.. but this ‘ere silly peasant called Adrian stole meh sleepin’ bag ’e did!
Lucky fer meh I was able to share with the lass..*Chuckling loudly the bartender slapped Ryan on the back a few times*
Bywhaha! Ye sly daemon ye! Ye sure ye just didn‘t give away yer backpack to the peasant?!*Mumbling faintly Ryan started to fiddle with the label on his ale bottle a little*
E..ehh… well.. Err.. I nay got lucky with ‘er I did.. But she‘s nay that kind of lass! Every time I just tried to get friendly she elbowed meh in the ribs she did! I still ‘ave em bruises!
Well… I told ye I thought we would ‘ave been there fer days roit…?
Well.. I was wron‘! Since the next mornin‘ this ‘ere silly lookin‘ sailor fellow was knockin’ on em walls of our fort!
Good thin‘ too since some bloodi git ate more then ‘alf of our provisions durin‘ the night.. I still be thinkin‘ its that bloodi Kal I tell ye.
But this ‘ere sailor fellow I was talkin‘ about was a pain in the arse! ‘E wanted eight ‘undred coins just to consider takin‘ us off the island.. I could ‘ave strangled ‘im roit there I tell ye… but when ‘e saw that there lass ‘is offer changes all of the sudden it did.. All ‘e wanted was some private time with ‘er and ‘e would take us off the island.. Well… ye know ‘ow lonely em sailor folk get.. And meh nay wantin‘ to die on that bloodi rock I agreed to ‘is terms.
*The bartender stopped laughing and stared at Ryan with widened eyes*
Y…ye did what now?! Ye just rented out that lass so ye could get yer sorry arse off that there island?!
Ye know ye were right… I am goin‘ to toss ye out of me tavern! And ye‘d better say hello to them rocks down there fer me!*Gulping Ryan leaned back and quickly shook his head*
O..oi! Ye didn‘t hear meh out ye did! Just ‘ear meh out and I tell ye.. It won‘t seem as bad as it sounds!*Grunting loudly the bartender released the large rolling pin he was planning on using as a weapon against Ryan and leaned on the bar again*
N…n..now as I was sayin‘… I agreed to ‘is terms I did.. And ‘e took us to ‘is ship… that thin‘ was in a worse condition then mine I tell ye! And mine was layin’ on the bottom of the ocean.
It still be a miracle that ’e got us to the main land with that there thin’ before it sank.. But when ’e did ’e immediately tried to force ’imself on the lass ’e did.. We all kicked ’is arse and send ’im ’ome though.. I mean.. what animal would rent out a lass to save ’is own arse roit? Har Har!
*Smiling faintly the bartender looked down at the new drawing Ryan shoved in front of him and chuckled*
Bywhaha! I knew ye weren‘t ‘’that‘’ bad lad! Ye might be acting tough and everything all the time.. But deep down inside yer still a softy!*Mumbling loudly Ryan waves a dismissive hand towards the bartender and continued with the sketches in front of him*
Aye aye! Now… err… where was I..? Ohh aye!
Em problems nay ended when we made it back to land I tell ye… that bloodi eijit set us off in a bloodi swamp ’e did! There were snakes.. Giant monsters and avatar knows what else tryin’ to whack us… and.. Well… it worked..
This ’ere Adrian fellow I told ye about before… well… ’e… ’e.. ’e got ’imself ’urt by one of em big swamp things… and well.. If that was nay everythin’.. that stinkin’ thin’ poisoned ’im as well!
Well… I stayed behind to fight off em monsters I did… but when I finally reached em others… it was too late. *Sighing heavily Ryan showed another sketch in front of the bartenders sad looking face*
Well… we did ‘ave this ‘ere nice burial fer ‘im we did.. The lass even got ‘im some nice flowers and everythin‘… and I tossed this ‘ere pretty stone I found into the grave fer ‘im..
So… well.. That be everythin‘.. and err.. A…are ye cryin‘..?*Ryan stared blankly towards the big bald sobbing bartender*
I..it just be such a sad story!! That poor Adrian! He shouldn‘t have passed away like that I tells ya!*Nodding slowly Ryan patted the sobbing bartender on the back a few times and stood up from his stool*
Ehhh… W..well.. Err… I‘ll just let meself out then… G‘night!*Ryan quickly ran towards the door and slammed it behind himself leaving the sobbing bartender behind in his dark tavern*
Poor poor Adrian!! Boohooohoo!!
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