The Reluctant Captain's Log

[Raiden Morana]

MONDAY 18th JUNE.

I'd forgotten what a great lass Kelly is... And that is fecking shocking on my part. I feel like I've taken her for granted the last week or two. Her friendship, her comradeship, the roof over my bloody head. Damn shoddy conduct, Raiden.

Hoagie's magnificent production of The Rage Of Raaz was so *something heavily redacted* 'magnificent' that I had to take a brief nap in the barracks but all the revelers in the Goblin soon woke me and I bumped into Kelly as I made my way to the tavern.

'The love of yer life is in there.' The words cut a bit.
'Hoagie?' I offered.
'No, the blondie.' Before I could reply. 'Come on, you can buy me a drink.'

Such an epic performance that I needed a nap!

I was waiting to get served at the bar as Kelly made her way over to plonk herself down next to Aries. I knew what was coming and that's before Pickles handed over the jug of whiskey... Not a shot... Not a bottle... A bloody jug.

Now it usually goes, 'You break his heart, I'll break your face/arms/legs' but noooo, not with Kel'. Oh no... 'You break his heart and I'll kill ye.' Well glad we got that sorted whilst I was stuck down the other end of the bar.

I wandered over and sat at the other side of Aries, Kelly was already plying her with whiskey.

'Aries, Kelly... Kelly, Aries.'
'We've already met.' Aries replied, looking glassy eyed. That whiskey works fast.
'We're bezzie mates... Kel' be nice.'
'I am being nice! Anyway, I'm off. If you bring her home, don't wake me up.' Uggh... Nice one Kel'. Niiiiice.

Aries didn't seem too phased. In fact, she commented that she was happy that I have such protective friends, seeing as she obviously can't be in Cove all the time. She's such a sweetheart.

I love Kelly to bits. Maybe I need to show that more often. But then again, she'd probably tell me to feck off and stop being so bloody soft. I know this though. If anyone hurt her. I wouldn't just kill them. I'd make sure they died bloody hard...

[Raiden Morana]

TUESDAY 19th JUNE.

Ever wake up in an unfamiliar bed? In a strange room? With a pretty lass snuggled up to you? Well... I have... A few times to be fair but not for a while and when I woke this morning, it kinda threw me.

The jolt I woke with almost disturbed her. Sweet Aries. Snuggled against me, a stuffy horse clutched to her chest. A frown across her forehead as she slumbered. Hopefully that was just the after affects of the whiskey Kelly was throwing down her neck last eve.

Time for duty. I left her snoozing, as I quietly tugged on my armour and made my way back to Cove. I was a little tardy and joined Keitaro's mission on the fly. Apparently earning the nickname 'Fancy'? Heh. Nowt much fancy about me, except maybe my sash!

Deadites destroyed and Bouras bashed! All in a day's work!

Many undead despatched and the mission complete we returned to Cove. Just as well, as my knee was aching something rotten. After I rested it a bit, I caught up with Raven's patrol to slay some Bouras and masterminded the victory in the 3 vs 3... Tibby and Pickles might have helped a bit too.

Still, we downed Gimbly, Raven and a recruit without loss. Good teamwork and healing.

The knee is getting stronger but it does aches like a bugger!

[Raiden Morana]

WEDNESDAY 20th JUNE.

Just a quick note tonight.

I arrived at the barracks just as Tibby's raiding party returned from the orc mines in Yew. He seemed shaky. The men, though none said a word, seemed a little spooked too, or was I imagining it?

Mission accomplished! The orc's mining operation destroyed but Tib' seemed to take it to heart that there wasn't as much loot as we'd hoped for... He was in a world of his own as he wandered up the barracks steps mumbling to himself. He'd seemed away with his thoughts a few times when we were reminiscing with Kas the other night too.

He's always been a rock of a guardsman. Literally. Even from when I was a recruit. I hope he's nay going the way of Gregor. I need to keep an eye on him. For the men's sake... But also... I dunno how much of a mate he considers me but I consider him one and I nay have many left.

I need to keep a bloody eye on myself too. Am I slowing down that much? Just out of practice? Is the knee hampering me? Got knocked over twice tonight by Keitaro. Nay shame in that, his prowess as a warrior is growing but... Ughh... Feels like I'm getting too old... Or maybe too soft?

Feck...

[Raiden Morana]

MONDAY 25th JUNE - Part One.

This might be a long one.

So, where to begin? I'm sure we've all forgot stuff. Recruits forget their kit all the time and the like but how do you forget that you are feckin' married and how do you explain that to the girl you love... When she's not actually the person you're married to?

Feck's sake... I think I've been hit over the head one too many times... And right now, it feels like I've just had my guts sliced open.

I started the eve placing recruitment banners and then joined a Yewish patrol, after receiving a raven from Aries. I joined them at Valor. Apt name I reckon, given the ferocity with which we had to fight. "Don't die." She said as she led me in from the portal. She fought bravely, she stood in the face of the onslaught. She stood.

Fighting giant dragons couldn't prepare me for what was to follow...

After making our way back and with our duty complete, Aries took me for a walk through the forests. Where in the feck we were I had nay idea. Somewhere in Yew but aye, nay idea where. She took me to a waterfall and a place where folk get married... MARRIED!

It hit me like one of Tibby's haymakers!

I'd been so feckin self absorbed these last few weeks. I mean, I feel bad enough that I've all but forgotten about Railen, even though she is likely long gone, or worse still, dead... But to be alone, with this gorgeous young lass, in such a beautiful place and to have to break it all to her and likely lose her because of my own selfish bloody pride... I felt like a Besieger had disemboweled me with a rusty feckin spoon.

I think she thought that I thought that she was hinting at marriage, when my mood changed, when all I could think about was her learning about Railen from someone else. I had to tell her. I had to front up. I had to stand.

It's getting hard to write now. I need a break. Just that look in her eyes as she tried to comprehend. "You're married?"

It broke my heart...

[Raiden Morana]

MONDAY 25th JUNE - Part Two.

She stood.

I just blurted it all out. How I'd come back to a burnt out ruin of a home. How everywhere I looked or asked, no-one had heard of or seen Railen for years. How the reason for my leaving Cove was to keep her safe, after numerous attempts on her life... How I'd resigned myself to her being lost. How I'd locked that away in my heart, in my mind and that from the moment she'd walked back into my life, Aries was the only thing to fill those places now...

She stood...

Why didn't she run? Why didn't she smash me in the face. I deserved it. Not that I lied, or hid anything on purpose. Hell, I was risking my only happiness in this cruel, Avatarforsaken world by telling her the truth.

"You're the one for me. You always have been, you always will be."

I think I cried.

I know that for a moment it felt like I'd died.

Everything stopped. I couldn't breath. My heart wasn't beating...

I was a fresh recruit again, hopping nervously from one foot to the other, sweaty hands trying to grip my sword, moments away from filling my breeches as the Kaldorians and Samurai charged.

"I know you can fight lads... But can you stand?" Gregor's words echoing in my ears.

We stood. And we fought.

I'd broken her heart. I could turn and run, or I could stand.

I stood...

[Raiden Morana]

TUESDAY 26th JUNE.

Where was bloody SANDERSON!

Nay at home. Nay at the barracks. Nay around the shire.

I needed her counsel. She always told it how it is with me. Nay fancying it up or sparing hurt feelings. That's the sort of advice I needed and I could find neither hide nor hair of the lass!

I wanted to do 'something' for Aries. Not to say I was 'sorry' or to make 'amends'. I'd not done owt wrong really... I just wanted to do something nice for her. But what?

Cake! Girls like cake right? And wine! Right off shopping I went! Got a lovely cake. The baker said it had jam in the middle! Lovely! Nice bottle of wine and back to hers... Wait. There's no furniture. I need a table and some chairs. And candles! They love candles!

I sent off a raven to Kelly as I started setting things up at Aries place and paced up and down, waiting for the pretty ex-Waywatcher to arrive.

Still no word from Kelly. Bugger. Down to you Raidy...

I was even more cumbersome than usual, when trying to do romantic stuff. I think she sensed it but she was sweet and whilst we'd already 'made up' some last night, things were still a little awkward... And just I was about to push that awkwardness to new heights, Kelly's raven arrived, thankfully. She was in the Swaggers with Tibby... Ughh. This was going to be fun.

I excused myself, quoting duty and made haste to Vesper.

'Alrigh' bestie!' Kelly was sat in Tib's lap. Both of the flushed with ale. How long had they been at it? The ale I mean... 'Still with the Yewish one?'

'Aye, well, I dunno, maybe... I need some advice Kel.'
'I'm not yer bleeding mother!'
'I think I've fecked it up.' I lowered my voice. 'I sorta forgot to tell her that I might still be married.'
'You 'might' still be married' Came a shocked voice from behind me.
'Bloody hell Pickles! How good are your ears!?'
Tib roared with laughter. 'The 'ole tavern knows now!'
'Feck! Kel...' I looked at her almost pleadingly.
'Ugghh... Right, don't go telling her you love her, or buying her stuff. It makes you look like a pussy!'
'Uhhhmmm... I might have already bought her a cake. That's alright, isn't it?' I might have already told her I loved her too, gah. But I kept that one to myself.
'Pusssssssssssyyyyyyyy!' She wasn't sparing the feelings, that's for sure, heh.
'Feck.' I chuckled ruefully. I thought Tibby's sides would split.
'Look... If she wants to be with you, she'll come round. If not, there's plenty more lasses out there. Your wife is probably dead. She needs to get over it. Just be yourself. The gifts and stuff isn't you. It's 'you' that she loves... If she loves you.' As always, Kelly was right. To a point at least. I can be bloody romantic when I need to be but it felt like I was pussy footing around. And that isn't me.

'Right! I'm off! I'm going to go up there and kick her back door in and show her the real Raiden!'

And so I did!

We barely touched the cake... It was still there as dawn approached. I grinned to myself as I strapped on my armour, before heading back to Cove. I sneaked into Kelly's place. I could hear her snoring as she slept off last night's booze. A big slice of cake waiting for her on the breakfast table when she woke. Bless her. My best mate in all the world.

[Raiden Morana]

WEDNESDAY 26th JUNE.

Last night was perfect. After the bloody bumbling and fumbling of the night before, it was perfect, from beginning to end.

We joined our Yewish allies on an expedition to Ilshenar. Through the hustle and bustle of rallying guardsman, I saw her. I saw her glance over. I saw her look away blushing when I winked. My Aries.

The Beseiger led us through the jungles of Humility and our combined force humbled all that set upon us. Driving wave after wave of increasingly nasty bastards away. Even as I blinked the sweat from my eyes, knee deep in corpses. I saw her. I had her. It's easy to watch someone's back when they are close and it seemed like she was never far from my side.

Finally her minions vanquished, their evil mistress appeared. Tibby suggesting I should seduce her and spare us the fighting. Heh. I'm sure I saw a twinkle in the bitch's eyes, just before we extinguished them forever. She died bloody hard. The men fought hard. Covians and Yewish. Side by side. Helping eachother up. Covering eachother's backs. Hoagie, Tibby, Gimbly and Kobra but feet apart. Aries closer still.

I needed it. I needed the fight. I needed to get the wishy washiness out of my system. The past is passed. I have to live for now and hope that there's a future...

Back in Stonekeep we enjoyed a well deserved drink. I'd got Aries some of the mead she likes. It took a while for her to settle but she was brave enough to sit at my table and then at my side when the bloody drunken Trainee had staggered to put his clothes back on. Heh. He reminded me of young Eason.

My hand rested on her knee, her hand atop mine. No awkwardness, the tension leaving her.  Her miscoloured eyes bright when I caught them in my gaze. Only one moment when they flinched. Nadia aiming a comment about Covians stealing away Waywatchers. Heh. Not any more. It's Ironarms for me. Blonde ones. Well... A particular blonde one, as Aries corrected me later.

Soon the tavern was empty. I must have dozed waiting for Tibby in the latrine. Bugger him. He's big enough and ugly enough to handle himself. I gave him one last shout, then I made my way to Aries.

She was waiting...

Perfect, from begininng to end.

p.s.

Hmmmm... I haven't seen Wilkes for a while. I wonder if he has the hump with me?

[Raiden Morana]

MONDAY 2nd JULY.

It's been a while. A fair bit to catch up on...

I won't really do into great depth about all the ribbing I got at the barracks off Sanderson, Hoagie and Pickles for being a sop. I mean... Me? A sop? Really? I wouldn't mind but Aries was bloody there and she was agreeing with them!

The night after, I attended the baths. It was nice to just have an evening off for relaxation. I made sure I was prepared though! I wore some plate chest armour under my robe, just incase Aries decided to bring her bow along. They say lightening nay strikes twice but with that lass, I was taking no chances.

The buffet was a little sparse, well, it was when I'd finished with it. Hoh! Though I did spend most of the evening in the latrine. Not the best of nights, especially as Aries was fending me off in the pool and bloody Mori decided to ONLY wear a lampshade on his head. Nay trunks... Just his silly bloody hat! A bit unfortunate really, as he'd been in the cold bath too.

Last night Sanderson pulled me to one side for a chat. Problems with recruits... a busted hand... Men troubles... Heh. Makes a change her talking to me about her love life. It's usually the other way around!

Sanderson: 'Y'know when you go out for some drinks with someone, you have a lovely night and then they end up being your spoon?'
Raiden: 'Uhmmm, nay. Not really lass.'

Never had a lass just been a spoon after turning on the Raiden charm! Heh... Anyway, turns out this fella was married. His wife pregnant and when Kel' swung for him the smashed her hand up. I strapped it as best I could but I'm no Kobra.

Poor lass... I gave her a big hug. I could tell it was all getting to her. I asked her about Aries. What she thought about her and us and stuff. She said she liked the lass. That'll do for me.

Later tonight, after another bloody argument with the bastards at the bank about releasing my stuff, I headed to Aries place. I helped myself to a few apples from her tree. Our own little orchard... She'd been in Cove. I must have just missed her. Kelly didn't though. She took her along to our place... Well, when I say our place, I mean Kelly's place. Gave her a key too.

What a girl. The pair of them...

[Raiden Morana]

WEDNESDAY 4th JULY.

What a bloody night.

A group of bloody pikies trying to pass off a narcotics operation as an 'art' class. Locking the stupid buggers up. Hours of bloody paperwork to cover it all, only to find out that one of our guards must have been on the take and had turned them loose.

Aries being home really was the only good news.

The look on her face though, when I started strapping on my armour to head out and re-apprehend the bloody gypoes... It melted my heart and most of my brains too I reckon. There's only one thing I really want to tell her. Three or four words. But why say that when a bloody epic will do?

I dig such a bloody hole, then extricate myself with daring, cunning wit and irresistible charm! Then dig a bloody bigger one. I try... Too hard maybe... I just want to keep her safe. Let her know I'm not leaving. I don't bloody know...

The things she says... They catch me off guard. They pull at me but when I open my gob, she thinks I'm pushing away. I'm not.

There's more to write but some things are best not dwelt on. Thankfully when we stop bloody talking eachother in circles, we're on the same page...

[Raiden Morana]

SUNDAY 8th JULY.

These few days have been perfect. Again.

Even though we get out of step now and again, when we both fall back in line, it's perfect. Like the most impenetrable fortress, the tightest shield wall, like a sword brother having your back and healing your wounds. We just become stronger...

Friday eve, we both dropped a bit of a conflag on eachother... I had orders that would see me leave before first light for a day or so and Aries pulled a bag of jewels from her pack that one of our recruits had gifted to her as a 'gift'.

She seemed troubled... She made me promise not to leave and not to get mad before she produced this 'present'. I didn't have the heart to tease her, given the furrows on her brow. She had nothing to fear. Heh. As if a bag of trinkets would come between us. Or the fact this recruit had drawn them together in a tree some days back too. Seemed all a bit childish to me but I suppose that's elves for you. I just hope he doesn't become too bothersome for her.

I was made to promise that I'd wake her. Upon my return. No matter what the hour. So as I stood there, still road weary, the moonlight pouring across her form, the bed sheet not covering all it should. It was the easiest of promises to keep.

...

A navy!? Boats!? Bloody boats!? And putting ME in charge of them!? If there's one thing I hate more than boats, it's horses, or anyone called Davion. For feck's sake. Who's bright bloody idea was that? Shadwell's, Hoagie's, Keres?

Bloody hell... Hopefully the Baron forgets about that in a hurry. It did seem to get lost amongst the dead man's boots recovery ratios and recruit mortality rates during the officer's meeting.

On a brighter note, plenty of guardsmen at the parade, a few promotions and a good old battle training afterwards by all accounts. I wouldn't know, I was too busy sourcing lumber and rum... Just in case.

[Raiden Morana]

TUESDAY 10th JULY.

I think tonight was like the first time Aries and me went on something resembling a date. I mean, other than when she wanted me to see the waterfall but that's best off forgotten.

I was a little late when I got to the Swaggers. I mean, how bloody hard is it to get your own money out of your own bank these days? She'd already ordered some food and was looking a bit miffed at my tardiness. Before I could go over, Esca collared me. Bloody hell. It was nice to share a few words with him that weren't crossed for a change but the lass looked more and more peed off.

I excused myself from Esca and went over. She's ordered for one but enough to eat for two. I was starving. No drink for me either. I got up and went to the bar. Thankfully Sioned wasn't working. I haven't been back in the Swaggers since she told me of her mother's demise and she was quite 'friendly' then... That would be all I needed. Ale in hand and polite, non flirty patter complete, I returned to our table.

She prodded some roast chicken my way with her knife. I knew her mood couldn't last. It wasn't long before that pretty smile graced her lips. There was some garishly clad fella exclaiming to Esca that he 'thought' some 'Covians' were in the tavern. No shit, Pickles was sat at the bar in her cap, kilt and sash. Good thing she had a shirt on too! (Otherwise I may not have stood) I remarked to Aries, just loud enough for the prick to hear, that he should be a Waywatcher, such were his powers of observation.

We heard some commotion outside and the tavern emptied to investigate. A couple of miscreants creating outside. They looked a bit familiar but they seemed harmless enough so our bellies full, the lass and I headed out for home. The weather was turning though, so I suggested we go to Kelly's place, rather than slogging it all the way to Yew.

I showed her around a bit. Trying to usher her past the kitchen and pink rug Kelly insists having by the hearth. I managed to get her out onto the balcony, in the moonlight, all romantic like. I was just about to show her my... Room, when Kelly arrived home. Heh. Endless ribbing ensued. I give up. I retired to my bed, catching them both whispering out of the corner of my eye. A good warrior knows when he's beaten.

Aries followed moments later. 'That' mischievous smile on her lips... We carried on from where we got rudely interrupted.

[Raiden Morana]

WEDNESDAY 11th JULY.

The men were putting up a sentry as I strode to the barracks. They looked like a sombre bloody bunch. Aries had that intense look. She was on her guard. A cry of anguish echoed from the cells. That would be why...

Three churchmen appeared, Hugo at the forefront. Ni'harel, beaten and bloodied, tossed to the ground like a ragdoll as they chastised all who would listen before going on their way. Bastards...

All the Drow's pandering to the church didn't spare her from the Templar's attentions. But still, she's a Covian guardsmen, one of my own. I had Kobra look her over and take her up to the infirmary whilst the rest of us stood guard.

One of the churchmen returned. Brazen bugger, I'll give him that. I approached him and demanded an explanation but all he did was talk in bloody riddles. Never a straight answer. Never an answer at all. Just replied to my questions with questions of his own. I sent him packing. I needed a drink. The Templar's brutality left a sour taste in my mouth.

Aries and I headed to the Goblin whilst the men dismantled the guardpost. She still had that look. I think she was worried that I'd challenged the churchmen but they are my men, I can't stand idly by and stomach their mistreatment without knowing the cause. She told me that the Drow are a proud race. That each one is 'perfect' Ni'harel had a cut from her scalp to her jaw. Not so perfect anymore.

Kobra and Pickles joined us. I told them to watch out for themselves and to watch out for the men. Keep them in line. Keep them in good order. If the church is scrutinizing the army, I want our lads on their toes and not on a bloody pyre. Or maybe the Templars were singling out the Drowling. If so, our elves and arcanists won't be far behind.

My mood darker and darker, Aries and I took our leave. We made our way to Kelly's. Only her embrace able to raise my spirits.

[Raiden Morana]

MONDAY 16th JULY.

My bloody head is pounding!

And it's nay just the wine giving me a headache! Zealous bloody churchies. Lovelorn bloody recruits. Devious bloody elves. And every lass in the bloody land stopping me to say hello. And that's before I mention my duties!

Kobra did damn well last night. A large force under his command and certainly a more challenging mission than Facey's the other night. Looks like another one destined for the Baron's Own. It's good to see the squads breathing fresh life into their lungs. Grenadiers, Scouts and Arcanists abound! I just hope the Baron isn't serious about me resurrecting the navy...

Long live the Alliance!

It's grand to see so many Recruits and Watchmen coming through too. I just wish they'd all bugger off with their making puppy eyes at Aries. And that bloody elf! I told her to watch out for him. Gave her yet more precious stones and then sent her on a wild goose chase to the church when I was waiting for her in the tavern. A few minutes later and she'd have missed me altogether. I think she's getting wise to him though. I just hope he's not being troublesome for the her. I know all the attention grates on her. Still, she did offer to buy me something nice with all the gems Saer' had given her. I told her, all I wanted was her. That went down well I think. I need to keep an eye on him for sure. He seems like a devious little bastard. I think Aries is beginning to realise that.

Just as we did finally get some time alone, we had bloody Gar' banging at the door. Apologizing. Insulting the feral lass. Apologizing some more. Re-insulting the feral lass... Declaring his undying love for Aries. Apologizing. Insulting the feral lass. He was lucky to leave with his face intact.

What the bloody hell is it with them all? I mean, I don't blame all these fellas for doting over Aries. She does have an amazing arse personality! I just feel for her having to  deal with all the unwanted attention the moment she sets foot in Cove.

In other news, the reply I got from the churchie was a little short. I was hoping for more bedtime stories. I reckon he's not into foreplay. Another devious bugger to look out for it seems...

[Raiden Morana]

WEDNESDAY 18th JULY.

The men did well the other night, during Kelly's mission to Shame. A good bunch of Recruits and Watchman coming through. If they last long enough to make Junior, then the army will be well on it's way to former glories. As long as the bloody church keeps their claws off of them.

Some commotion at the barracks when we got back. A lot of common folk milling around. One of them caused a cafuffle and tried to loot my winnings for being first guardsman back to the barracks. Bastard. He was soon on his arse and a few kicks in the ribs later, the gold was back in my purse.

Aries and I managed to get some time alone together, finally. Perhaps the good luck coins Kel' gave us work after all? She makes herself so small, so defenceless in my arms. She spoke more last night about her feelings than in all the time we've spent together. Now and afore.

Is that what triggered the nightmare I wonder...

Saddle weary and caked in dust I climb down from my mount... The smouldering ashes of my estate in view. I left to protect them. They were in harms way every day I was Commander. I banished myself for their benefit. That's what I told myself. That's what kept me going all those years in the colonies. When all I really did was sign their death warrants with my departure.

If I didn't have the lass, I don't know what I'd do...

[Raiden Morana]

SATURDAY 21st JULY - PART ONE.

Another goodbye...

Aries will live! Tripps quick thinking almost certainly saved her life. I was stunned. Rooted to the bloody spot. It was like I was looking down on myself mon, watching, as everything unfolded. Aries' blood on the sandstone paving, she was pale, literally turning green as the Besieger forced potions down her neck. Only his stern words cut through the fog that had enveloped me.

I thought I would lose her, matey.

Skip forward a day and I'm sat on a beach talking to you, ten years after yer died. Heh... Ye bastard! Leavin' me and Kelly behind like yer did.

*-Raiden tipped the stinking, putrid mix of Vince's ashes and Aries vomit into the sea-*

Ye were a brother ter me Vince. More than tha'. Keep an ale cold and a chair warm in the great hall fer me, eh?

Goodbye once more bruddah.

What a feckin' night...