Led courageously ambitiously hopelessly by:
Regular Guardsman Kas Valentine.
Attended by:
Sergeant Hoagie.
Regular Scout Olchafa Serpernt.
Regular Guardsman Perrin.
A small number of us were loitering around the barracks after a successful expedition into distant swamps when Perrin came up with the suggestion of heading somewhere else. Without missing a beat I immediately insisted we prove ourselves as heroes by heading straight to Hythloth. The men were up for it and soon enough we stood before the dungeon's mountain entrance.
After a brief moment to consider what we might find inside we charged in. The halls were dark and dank so I enhanced the vision of our would be warriors with the night sight cantrip. Our group bashed it's way through the upper corridors with ease, leaving a trail of dead imps and hell hounds in our wake. However despite besting countless foes there was precious little evidence of treasure, so we headed deeper and deeper.
We bundled through an ancient teleporter and suddenly found ourselves split into two groups. Olchafa and myself had been thrown into a room full of beady eyed gazers while Perrin and Hoagie were battling through a legion of angry gargoyles. With frequent use of our jabbing fingers the scout and I negotiated our way back to the other Covians and continued on our journey.
Before long we came across a magically sealed walkway, only by taking the route set by the creator could you hope to reach the end. With a grin I wished the others well and went about bypassing the simple enchantment with cunning use of the teleport spell. Once at the opposite side of the walkway I sat down and amused myself with a meal of bread and cheese until eventually the others joined me, albeit with rather annoyed expressions.
The stairway to the deepest and darkest area of Hythloth stood before us, so with a shaking of hands and a quick passing around of some liquor we descended. The concentration of gargoyles was immense in the room below but with a bash here, a slash there and several massive explosions we managed to clear the area and prepare ourselves for battle.
Unfortunately Hoagie had somehow managed to misplace his trousers by this point but we went on regardless. Kegs or no kegs, the Lord of the Abyss couldn't give a stuff.
A battle royale ensued with all four of us dashing around the towering Balron, desperate to avoid the swings of his tree sized broadsword. Olchafa stabbed wildly in the dark, Hoagie alternated between defending himself and covering his dignity with a shield while Perrin simply roared with rage and brought his mace crashing down upon demonic toes.
As the fight went on gargoyles began to flood into the chamber, doubtless alerted by the demon Lord's cries of agony and frustration. I was throwing out healing enchantments as fast as I could, keeping my cohorts on their feet while at the same time running to evade the fierce monsters.
S'hard to recall exactly how it happened but eventually the massive body of the Balron came crashing to the ground. With a cheer we retreated back to the stairway to catch our breath. Once rested we headed back down, cleared away the remaining gargoyles, filled our backpacks with treasure and ripped out the jawbone to take back as proof of our venture.
You would imagine with the Lord of the Abyss out of the equation that our adventure would rapidly become easier, but no, Hythloth had other plans. If we were going to get back to the surface I was going to need to replenish my supply of reagents, so I recalled out, assuring my friends of a swift return.
Naturally, this didn't work out as planned, when a Valentine assures you of safety always
always assume the worst. I say this because on the journey back I was accosted by no less than ten gazers and must have blacked out under the force of their spells. The next thing I remember is being pulled to my feet by Perrin while Chaffers and Hoagie kept the massively violent eyeballs at bay.
Without prompting I instantly opened a portal back to Cove and we piled through, the plan to fight our way out abandoned. Despite our swift exit I made sure all three men knew what we'd accomplished before dismissing them with a proud smile.
Trophy Collected: Jaws of the Balron.
Gold Collected: A paltry three thousand coins.
Egotistical Satisfaction: Immense.
Level of Nudity: Moderate.
For glorious Cove !
Signed in excessively colourful handwriting with a little drawing of a bunny,
Regular Guardsman Kas Valentine.
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