ISSUE 4: REVIEWS OF RAAZ

[Covetowne Gazette]

Commander Hoagie Grayner didn't burst, but rather ambled onto the scene this month with his directorial debut and lukewarm rendition of the classic Covian tale "The Rage of Raaz."

The cast themselves gave an enthusiastic but slightly amateur performance, with particular charm coming from the leading couple, Raaz and Barry, played by Meiko (last name unknown) and Serj Eason, of the famed Eason name. However, all of the charm and enthusiasm mustered by the actors could not save the play from its fundamentally empty script and uninspired direction.

Many of us here at the Gazette were excited when the play was announced, but with off-key writing, flat jokes, and an uninspired fight sequence, this "rage" was more of a temper tantrum.

2/5

FIRE! FIGHTING! ROMANCE! A stunning and exhilarating display by the sure-to-be famous theatre troupe "The Rambunctious Vegetables." Dead orcs, audience participation, and a piece of classic Covian history wrapped up in an easily-digestible package. Fun for all the family!

5/5

Meb like bit were orcs klomp tupid hoomies.

4/5

What will we review next? Find out in the next issue of Cove's most trusted news source.

[Serj Eason]

"With charm coming from the leading couple, Raaz and Barry, played by Meiko (last name unknown) and Serj Eason, of the famed Eason name."

Serj put the copy of the Covetowne Gazette down. They may have hated the script but at least the actors were enjoyed. 'Still got it!', he thought to himself.

Serj