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Author Topic: Elf Hunt Poison Thingies  (Read 4921 times)
John Dell
Covian Guardsman
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« on: February 11, 2007, 12:42:15 am »

John whistled merrily as he walked with his newly filled gold purse towards the nearest tavern.

- And what would yeh like t'day lad?
- Ehh.. ale!


John spent all his hard earned pay on ale.. Dumb as he was he spent it all on one ale. Tiberius stepped into the tavern and slammed his metal buttocks down on a seat next to Dell.

- What are ye' doing there Dell boy?
- Tibby! Well I is drinking I am. Also I was supposed teh write some kinna report or something.
- Sprhcth! Since when did you learn how to write!?
- Uhh. Never I don't think sir.. why?
- Wh.. uhh never mind John!
- Want ter help me write it sir?
- Sure!




Poison Hunt Thing..   "Are you sure that was it?" / "Yeah! ..something loike that anyway."

Led By:

Some dirty el..   "I can't write that!" / "..wha'??"
Dalamar

In attendance:

- So.. who attended man!?
- ...
- Stop picking your nose you bafoon!!


Sergeant Hoagie   "He's a Sergeant all of a sudden?? / "Shadwell got cranky or something I think."
Officer Cadet Garak ..something
Junior Guardsman John Dell
Watchman Max O'Munpain


So we all lined up and then them bastard elves started

- Dell!
- What??
- You can't bloody have that in yer report!
- Why the heck not?
- Because there are so many of them. They'd all jump you if they read your report.
- Oh yeh.. that does make sense. I think..


So, them elf bas.. "Right.. I'll just leave it out."


We all lined up outside the barracks before taking off. Checked our gear and all that, it was to be a long journey in the lands of the Yeller bastards.

- Sir?
- What?
- You're not going to remove that then?
- No, no one likes a yeller.
- ..right-o


When we stepped into the silly elves blue thingy we got to some other blue thingy and then I got lost. But I got lost in a city so it was okay because I went to this tavern, and they had real strong booze and then I drank loads and then I went out and went back and then I came to some other place. And there was some weird book next to some yeller with a long sword that was bent really strangely and then I took it because I needed to go to the toilet behind the bushes. The pages felt good on my bottocks. Then I went into the weird blue thing again and then I got right and found the other ones and the silly elves.

We got gated to our target and lined up on the other end.

Our group ventured deeper into the Yeller land and began to walk towards the deep forests. There we came across a strange specie of wolves, we had to fight them off as they were strangely aggressive.



- What did the wolves look like?
- Well, them was big. And blue; them looked a lot like my pet ones I had in Cove before!
- You what?!?


As we ventured deeper into the forest where the snow had yet to melt away from the side of the roads and the tree tops, we encountered several hostile creatures that looked like birds in an ambush along with some Yeller rouge samurai.



- So what did the birds look like?
- Well them w..
- Actually! I don' wan't ter know!


Then we all fell and got pushed back.

We all kind of got swamped with them monsters. That's what you get for going out on missions with elves!


We then moved towards our goal! The big beetles where near, but before we went to collect our mission objective we had to slash our way through massive amounts of foul beasts. Such as lizard men and newly hatched.. things!



- Were they really that many?
- More then the Haven people!
- Oh my!
- But they was well weaker then them Haven people!
- That's a trait hard to top! Bwahaha!
- Hahah! ..wha?


We continued to make our way North-West-East-South-ways.. towards our target! Ones we had arrived near the empty Cottages where the Beetles roamed we were hit heavily by them. Them popped up in great numbers and we nearly got eaten! I wouldn't have said no if one of the elv..
And Dalamar retrieved the well sought poison from the beetle as we cleaned our gear from beetle goo.

- So where are the sketches over the retrieval?
- I needed to do the toilet again!!
- You wh.. Gah!


After the retrieval we got made our way home through one of the gates and lined up infront of the tavern and split the loot, and got a dismissal.

- What you writing sir?
- No mind that! Just drink your ale you baboon.
- Okay!




- Did you actually remember getting dismissed?
- Nay really sir.
- It's weird how you never remember the important things!
- Loike wha'?
- Well, like that poison retrieval!
- What poison retrieval thing!?
- ...



Signed Tiberius Kane,
On Behalf of Junior John Dell
« Last Edit: February 11, 2007, 12:44:14 pm by John Dell » Logged


"Technological progress is like an axe in the hands of a pathological criminal."

Oct sayeth  (19:47):
We need more Swedes.
Oct sayeth  (19:47):
"I was stabbed."
Oct sayeth (19:47):
"But I will hold this in and carry on."

First Story       --->      Smiley
Second story --->      Undecided
Third Story     --->     Sad
Smudrud
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I came, I saw, I ran away!


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« Reply #1 on: February 11, 2007, 12:50:31 am »

Well done Dell, me's need some writing help aswell


[OOC]FANTASTIC! HILARIOUS! The best report I've ever read, F**king Awesome! Keep up Grin Grin Grin[/OOC]
« Last Edit: February 11, 2007, 07:12:39 pm by Darath Mithar » Logged

Mela Arkay
'Must be stopped'
The Light Company
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<3 PooSwallower


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« Reply #2 on: February 11, 2007, 12:56:15 am »

Very..Well...

Scout Sergeant,
Mela.E.Arkay.


(OOC: Enjoyed the report! was fun to read =D )
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userjosh5368
Guest
« Reply #3 on: February 11, 2007, 11:55:26 am »

Okay.... i guess he can learn..... *Sighs*

Signed
Demarian Tel'var


[OOC- Haha Dell that is the funniest report ive seen in ages keep it up man!]
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Marcus Kobra
Regular Grenadier
Cove Command
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Posts: 1261


"Death is certain, When is up to your Medic."


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« Reply #4 on: February 11, 2007, 01:03:02 pm »

Good work for Cove!!

[OOC: OMG!! I am cracking up so hard that well.. my co-workers have again! questioned my sanity.  makes me want to get myself a fighter for the army... then i miht experience some of this stuff!!]
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The Lord hath created medicines out of the earth; and he that is wise will not abhor them.
qom_riyadh
Guest
« Reply #5 on: February 11, 2007, 03:13:00 pm »

Hah! Ye see?! That's why it's recommended to visit taverns... you can always count on people willing to help...

Great mission it was, indeed...

[OOC]Absof**kinlutely great report Grin *thumbs up*[/OOC]
« Last Edit: February 12, 2007, 06:48:07 pm by Mela Arkay » Logged
Max O Munpain
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« Reply #6 on: February 11, 2007, 11:31:41 pm »

A ........ well thought report


(ooc) That was the best report ive read dell you get to write them all from now on *winks*(/ooc)
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You'll meet my Mace before my Emotions!
John Dell
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Covian Legend
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Karma: +42/-45
Posts: 2881



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« Reply #7 on: February 12, 2007, 06:28:03 pm »

(OOC: I thought it was rather nifty! Tongue
Not sure if Dalamar is pleased with it though? The picture mysteriously disappeared and all! Oh well, glad you enjoyed it Tongue )
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"Technological progress is like an axe in the hands of a pathological criminal."

Oct sayeth  (19:47):
We need more Swedes.
Oct sayeth  (19:47):
"I was stabbed."
Oct sayeth (19:47):
"But I will hold this in and carry on."

First Story       --->      Smiley
Second story --->      Undecided
Third Story     --->     Sad
Conan Darkmoon
Dead
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Posts: 552

Grenadier of Cove, Protector of the Baron..


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« Reply #8 on: February 12, 2007, 06:37:47 pm »

 Not a bad hunt, especially if it's being led by Dalamar.  As always, an excellent report.

 *Signed* Conan Darkmoon
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Snudrud
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Posts: 81


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« Reply #9 on: February 13, 2007, 09:54:15 pm »

Good job, but the truth is, that me's could have done it better......i must say...

Snudrud

(/OOC/ great report, i think you would have won my report competition...if there were any competitors....Great report! /OOC/)
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